• Congrats, OJ: you’ve officially been charged with kidnapping. [WLC]
• Blind items about Justin Timberlake are fun. [WW]
• Barry Manilow and Elisabeth Hasselbeck are in the middle of a bitch fight. [Gabsmash]
• Mena Suvari’s hair is beginning to reappear. [Bastardly]
• Lauren Conrad shared her top-secert diet tips. Ooooh. [RR]
• What’s going on with Rosie O’Donnell and Oprah? Just make out and get it over with already. [SOW]
• Ugh, Rod Stewart in boy shorts. [CS]
• Yay child labor! [GH]
• George Clooney’s new live-in girlfriend bit the head off a scorpion. Oh hey, circus freak. [Celebitchy]
• The back view of Pam Anderson is much better than the front view. [DH]
• Speaking of which, Kanye West still hates Pam Anderson. [CS]
• Cheryl Tweedy seems kinda slutty to me. [JIYH]

Ok, I’m exaggerating, but that’s kinda/sorta the sentiment a judge issued today while ruling over Britney Spears’ and Kevin Federline’s custody dispute. The judge claimed “there is a habitual, frequent, and continuous use of controlled substances and alcohol by (Britney).” He ordered Britney “to undergo testing for the use of controlled substances and alcohol,” which will be conducted randomly twice a week. Oh snap.

The documents underscore the bitterness in the custody battle. Judge Scott Gordon ruled that “Each party is restrained from making derogatory remarks about the other party and the other party’s family or significant other…”

The judge also prohibits Brit and K-Fed from “using corporal punishment with the minor children and from allowing anyone else to do so.”

The judge also ordered the battling parents “to engage in joint co-parenting counseling.” The order continues, “Each party is ordered to complete the PARENTING WITHOUT CONFLICT program.”

The judge went on, “Neither party shall consume alcohol, or other non-prescription controlled substance during or for the 12 hours immediately preceding any period such party is responsible for the health and safety of the minor children.”

Despite rampant rumors, Britney did not lose custody of Sean Preston and Jayden James. According to the judge’s order, no changes were to be made in the 50/50 custody split between Britney and Kevin.

Bad news, justice-lovers: the jury in the Phil Spector murder trial indicated to the judge that they are unable to reach a verdict in the music producer’s murder trial.

Superior Court Judge Larry Fidler said he might consider giving the jury the option of a manslaughter charge. Currently, the jury is only considering a second degree murder charge.

My condolences to the family and friends of Lana Clarkson; I can’t imagine how difficult this must be for them.

Paris Hilton apparently partied a little too hard on Emmy night; homegirl ended up stumbling around the streets of LA Sunday evening, and make attempts at scaling the iron gates at a friend’s home. Fortunately, she made in through the night in one piece.

Photographers snapped Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds walking hand-in-hand at LAX Monday after the couple returned from a flight to Vancouver.

Although Scarlett and Ryan kept that shit on the down-low for the past few months, they appear to be going public with their relationship. Good for them.

Source

After much speculation, InTouch Weekly confirmed Jennifer Lopez is pregnant with her first child. A source told the mag JLo and Skeletor had an ultrasound in NYC on September 12, but plan to wait to make an official announcement.

“The test calculated that she was about 12 weeks pregnant. She’s due in the spring.”

After several failed attempts to conceive, the couple reportedly underwent in vitro fertilization, and friends claimed she may be pregnant with twins.

Jennifer Garner has really been surprising me lately; although I’ve always found her to be very fug, she’s managed to look really hot on the red carpet for the last couple of months.

Jennifer turned it out again for the LA premiere of her upcoming film “The Kingdom,” which I’m actually psyched to see.