• Paris Hiltonwould like you to know she’s the freshest B-boy in history, a’ight? [DL]
• Hayden Panettiere is still pimping out her baby brother. [BST]
• Naomi Campbell’s former assistant committed suicide. No, it didn’t involve a Blackberry. [CS]
• Compare and contrast: Marvin Gaye versus John Mayer. [MW]
• Sorry: no New Kids reunion. [LRM]
• Adnan Ghalib is reportedly ready to sell his collection of crazy-ass Britney Spears tapes. [PB]
• Victoria Beckham would like you to stop tanning. [CB]
• Vince Vaughn is very bloated. [WIMB]
• Uma Thurman got a little action at the beach. [TB]
• Check out Kylie Minogue’s new video for “In My Arms.” [WLC]
• Papa Joe wants 14 dudes to fight for Ashlee Simpson on some reality show. [RR]
• Boobs = pregnancy. Don’t try to fight science, Angelina Jolie. [BS]
• Katie Holmes is hopeful for a little brother for Suri. [GB]
• Katie Price says big boobs are so 2007. [SOW]
• Dog Chapman is a free man, according to Mexico. [BB]
• Kathy Griffin was banned from The View again. [AIW]
• Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel make a semi-public appearance together. [DH]
• Mariah Carey and her dog are pretty creepy. [WW]
• Drew Barrymore chills with her Mac dude. [GS]
• Kylie Minogue is best in show. [AY]
• Random Jessica Alba appearance. [DS]

Sam Lutfi lost his shit today after TMZ ran a story claiming Britney Spears’ mother Lynne thought he was poison to her daughter. The family reportedly wanted to stage an intervention in an effort to force Britney to get help for her mental issues, but Sam broke that shit up.

As TMZ first reported, the family is staging an intervention so Britney can get help for her bipolar disorder. Family sources say they are furious at Lutfi, claiming he pushed Brit into going to B.H. Mercedes today to buy a new car — in the middle of the effort to save her.

One source says the family believes Lutfi has been a “counterproductive, disquieting force” who has done nothing but harm.

Sam apparently reads TMZ on the regular, because shortly after that story went up, he called TMZ editor Harvey Levin and complained he was the one helping Britney, not her family. A docile Britney remained on the line with Sam and Harvey.

Lutfi said there was no intervention last night, but then said Britney’s family “barged in.” For the record, the family is staging an intervention and Lutfi has been kept in the dark.

Lutfi said of the family, “They have an agenda. Their agenda is jealously because they don’t fit in. I do. They see her three times a year.”

Britney was by the phone during Lutfi’s conversation with Levin. Lutfi claimed he did not force Britney to buy a car, asking Brit, “Did I force you to buy a car.” In a heavy southern accent she responded, “No.” He continued, “Do I ever bug you.” She replied, “We argue.”

Lutfi said Britney’s mom is fine with him — it’s her dad who’s a problem. Family sources tell TMZ that’s baloney — both Lynne and Jamie “are on the same page,” feeling like Sam is a “megalomaniac” who is motivated by “evil.”

Pure craziness, dudes. After reading that shit about Sam earlier this morning, I wouldn’t want homeboy anywhere near me.

Jessica Simpson had a few too many last night at a Metalskool show at the Key Club on the Sunset Strip. New boyfriend Tony Romo was forced to cram Jessica’s ass into a waiting car after show. Hot.

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Just a few days after making an ass out of herself at the Directors Guild Awards, old cracky Sean Young checked herself into a rehab facility to treat her alcoholism.

Young, 48, voluntarily admitted herself, according to a statement released by her rep, which read: “It is understood that Young has struggled against the disease for many years.”

On Saturday, Young caused a scene at the Directors Guild of America Awards in Los Angeles when she heckled The Diving Bell and the Butterfly director Julian Schnabel during his acceptance speech. She was promptly removed from the venue, according to a Variety report.

Headline-grabbing antics aren’t anything new for Young. In September, an Entertainment Weekly piece revisited her attempt to crash the 2006 Vanity Fair Oscar party, which also got her escorted out.

Also mentioned are the harassment of former costar James Woods and her attempt to get a role in Batman Returns by “[storming] the studio lot wearing a homemade Catwoman suit.”

Oh hey, Lindsay Lohan: this is your life in 20 years, so pay attention.

According to Page Six, Lindsay Lohan’s sobriety was very short lived.

Lohan “took a swig of vodka from a bottle of Grey Goose” at the Box Friday night as she partied with Stavros Niarchos, her deejay pal Samantha Ronson, Brody Jenner, and “an entourage of blond 20-somethings,” a witness says. Lohan was “trying to keep a low profile and covering her face.” Lohan and Niarchos then stopped by West 17th Street spot 1 Oak, where “Lindsay wasn’t drinking,” say sources, before returning to the Four Seasons Hotel, where they spent the night. Lohan’s rep had no comment.

Considering Lindsay spent most of 2007 in various rehab facilities, I think it’s time to give up on this one.

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After years of letting her behave like a total lunatic, Britney Spears’ family is reportedly ready to stage an intervention. Britney’s entire posse showed up at her Beverly Hills home last night after her barefoot crying jag, and according to TMZ, intend to find a “creative way” of forcing her to get help for her mental issues.

Sources told TMZ “if it happens,” it should happen this week. Last night, Brit’s mom, Lynne, her dad, Jamie, cousin Alli, as well as Sam Lutfi and Adnan Ghalib all showed up at Britney’s house and were all there at the same time.

Brit’s mom and dad (and others) have known for months that a bipolar disorder — and not substance abuse — is at the root of her problems. They cannot involuntarily commit her (impossible under these circumstances) and Brit has refused to voluntarily enter a hospital or even undergo evaluation for the problem. But now the plan is underway.

Here’s what’s significant: Britney has not spoken to her mom for a while — no contact at all. Last night, Britney and Lynne (along with Sam) left the house at one point and went to the drugstore, so it seems they are now interacting.

There were signs last night that Britney didn’t feel as warm toward her dad, that she didn’t want anything to do with him.

This move has been in the planning stages for well over a month. It should begin to unfold IF Britney cooperates, and that is the wild card.

BTDub, this “creative” intervention is different from what her divorce lawyers pitched to Commissioner Scott Gordon last week. They are not involved in this one.

Seriously, what is with her obsession with drugstores?

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Michael Lohan is filled with the spirit of God, and he’s gonna use it to kick the ass of coke dealers who sold to his daughter Lindsay. Hallelujah, brotha!

“I’ve been looking for the people who’ve been selling my daughter and these other kids the drugs,” said from Long Island. “And come hell or high water, one day I’m going to find these guys and I’m going to expose them.”

Lohan Sr. has lately been involved with a youth ministry called Teen Challenges. “God is going to get even with this guy,” he told me. “He’s destroyed a lot of lives.”

And I’m sure Michael will take the dealer’s stash with him after he “exposes” them. You know, for safe keeping and shit.

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