• At the very least, mildly retarded. [TB]
• Ugh, Katy Perry. [AY]
• Ali Lohan continues to be an asshole. [WIMB]
• Oh hey, it’s Scarlett Johansson’s cleavage. [DRW]
• Kim Cattrall confirmed a Sex and the City sequel. [CK]
• There’s no way that’s Whitney Houston. [CS]
• Christina Ricci does Vanity Fair. [BST]
• Puppy Cam! [SOW]
• Marisa Miller versus Heidi Klum. [DR]
• Larry King’s wife was reportedly caught cheating with a younger dude. [DS]
• Nick Hogan is banned from seeing his victim. [AIW]
• Danny Bonaduce was ordered to pay $16,000 a month in alimony. [HMG]
• Jamie Pressly and her baby-daddy are dunzo. [BB]
• Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake will join Madonna onstage tonight. [INMF]
• Ashlee Simpson is still pregnant. [IDWYL]
• Janet Jackson canceled the remaining dates of her “Rock Witcho” tour. [CFW]
• Guy Ritchie got ‘faced. [PB]

Suri Cruise took to the streets of NYC yesterday. The two year old and her mother, Katie Holmes, braved the rain to hit up a Baby Gap, and of course, look adorable in the process.

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While Holly Madison enjoys her now-public relationship with cheeseball magician Criss Angel, another Girl Next Door also moved on to a new dude. Hugh Hefner’s ex-girlfriend Kendra Wilkinson is reportedly engaged to Hank Baskett from the Philadelphia Eagles.

Sources claimed the wide receiver popped the question to the Playmate over the weekend during a visit to the top of Seattle’s Space Needle.

Both fams were present for the proposal, and Ken-babe seemed completely shell-shocked at the revealed ring. H.B. even got down on one knee to pop the big q to the former Playmate. Tho our source swears she saw the whole happy event with her own eyes, we inquired with K’s reps…haven’t heard back.

But, a close Kendra friend has confirmed, “it’s true.”

God, it always makes me sad to see sham relationships end. Poor Hef.

Along with a handful of fellow supermodels, Heidi Klum headed to NYC this week to do a fitting for Victoria’s Secret’s annual fashion show. The show will air December 3 on CBS.

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When Minnie Driver announced her first pregnancy last March, the 38 year old actress declined to name the father. According to Page Six, there was a good reason for that: Minnie’s baby-daddy bounced as soon as he found out she was knocked up.

Driver “was dating a TV writer,” one source told Page Six. “She told him she was pregnant, and he just left her. That’s why she’s been very quiet about the situation.” Rocker Craig Zolezzi, who previously dated the actress, has been suggested in the past to be the child’s father.

Minnie’s son, Henry Story, was born in September.

Source

We won the election, but we’re losing the best part of the election year: Tina Fey announced her Sarah Palin impersonation is dunzo. Tina’s spot-on portrayal of the dimwitted VP hopeful scored Saturday Night Live some of it’s all-time highest ratings, but Tina claimed it’s time to focus on her real job–aka “30 Rock.”

“I have to retire just because I have to do my day job,” the creator and star of 30 Rock told Entertainment Weekly. Tina endorsed SNL’s Kristen Wiig as her replacement, saying: “I think Wiig would do a really good job.”

As for whether there’ll be an official torch passing, Tina joked, “Maybe we could get a real torch, or I could give Wiig the Palin wig.”

Now that the election is over, it’s time for Sarah Palin to move on as well. First step: learn some geography.

Former Wilson Phillips singer Carnie Wilson is pregnant with her second child. Carnie’s rep confirmed the news, and added the baby is due in June.

Forty year old Carnie and husband Rob Bonfiglio also have a three year old daughter, Lola.

So good for her or whatever.