• Halle Berry isn’t sure if she wants to make another baby. [CB]
• Leonardo DiCaprio received a “Green” Kid’s Choice Award. [ER]
• Sexy. [CS]
• Like anyone gives a shit about Bill O’Reilly’s movie-viewing preferences. [GH]
• Heidi Klum is naked again. [CNW]
• Robert Pattinson is still defending his BO. [AG]
• Actual title: “Confessions of an LA Dodgers Groupie.” [AS]
• Shanna Moakler got a Snuggie. [POTP]
• Pam Anderson had some sort of makeover. [AIW]
• Madonna’s adoption hearing was put off until Friday. [CVL]
• Babies! [YH]
• More from the Kid’s Choice Awards. [AY]
• Natalie Portman really gets around. [DS]
• Tim Allen and his wife welcomed a baby girl over the weekend. [LS]
• Sarah Silverman has a new web-series. [JS]
• Wonk. [GS]
• Katherine Heigl has “high-class problems.” [WIMB]
• Vince Shlomi is a fucking asshole. [TB]
• Paris Hilton invades Miami Beach. [BST]
• Steve-O and Steve Wozniak have a beautiful bromance. [SOW]
• Josh Hartnett was rushed to the hospital this morning. [HMG]
• Gwyneth Paltrow plus sheer shirt plus kiddies. [INMF]
• Madonna and Jesus are totes dunzo. [PB]
• What happened to Emily Lloyd? [CFW]

A disheveled Lindsay Lohan posed with rapper Q-Tip at Queen Latifah’s 39th birthday party over the weekend. It was mildly frightening, despite the fact Lindsay looked as though she was trying extra-hard to appear fabulous.

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An Atlanta judge sentenced rapper T.I. to one year and one day in jail last week. Although he’s very pretty, and that might make you think he doesn’t deserve to go to jail, I assure you that is not the case:

The three-time Grammy winner was arrested in 2007 hours before the B.E.T. awards, and later charged with possession of three unregistered machine guns and two silencers and possession of firearms by a convicted felon.

A machine gun? Really? With kids all up in your house? Pfft.

T.I. (real name: Clifford Harris) and partner Tameka “Tiny” Cottle welcomed their second child, Major Harris, in May 2008. They also have a three year old son, King.

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Did you watch Nickelodeon’s 22nd Annual Kids’ Choice Awards on Saturday? I tried to avoid it, because I caught a couple minutes of it last year, and it made me feel like a creepy old person.

Luckily, I didn’t miss much this year: Rihanna and Chris Brown didn’t show up, and Miley Cyrus and Demi Lovato didn’t get into a fist fight, so why bother tuning in?

Here’s this year’s winners:

Favorite Movie
High School Musical 3: Senior Year

Favorite Male Movie Star
Will Smith, Hancock

Favorite Female Movie Star
Vanessa Hudgens, High School Musical 3: Senior Year

Favorite Animated Movie
Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa

Favorite Voice from an Animated Movie
Jack Black, as Po, Kung Fu Panda

Favorite Song
“Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It),” Beyonce

Favorite Male Singer
Jesse McCartney

Favorite Female Singer
Miley Cyrus

Favorite Music Group
Jonas Brothers

Favorite TV Show
iCarly

Favorite Reality Show
American Idol

Favorite Television Actor
Dylan Sprouse, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody

Favorite Television Actress
Selena Gomez, Wizards of Waverly Place

Favorite Cartoon
SpongeBob SquarePants

Favorite Male Athlete
Peyton Manning

Favorite Female Athlete
Candace Parker

Favorite Video Game
Guitar Hero World Tour

Favorite Book
Twilight series

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You are beautiful no matter what they say. Words can’t bring you down. You are beautiful in every single way. Yes, words can’t bring you down. Don’t you bring me down today.

Anyhoo, Christina Aguilera and her unhappy clown face attended Perez Hilton’s 31st birthday party on Saturday. Meanwhile, I sat in my apartment drinking too much, eating cupcakes, and talking to my cats.

And I’m OK with that: they were really good cupcakes.

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A leaked voicemail allegedly from Britney Spears hit the internet today. The call was reportedly placed by Britney to her attorneys in January 2009, asking for her father to be removed as her conservator.

No comment yet from Britney’s camp regarding the tape.

Along with her daughter and two sons, Madonna arrived in Malawi over the weekend. The singer, who adopted son David from the same African nation last year, reportedly hopes to adopt a four year old orphan named Mercy. A hearing on the matter will take place this morning, and if the judge agrees, Madonna could be allowed to adopt Mercy later today.

“Madonna will appear before a judge … to petition the court to certify her adoption,” a source at the High Court told Usmagazine.com. “Madonna will definitely be granted a temporary court order to allow her to take the child away with her.”

A court-appointed overseer will assess Madonna’s eligibility as a parent, and two reports will be presented before the judge before ruling on the adoption.

Simon Chisale, Malawi’s Chief Child Welfare Officer, he was the overseer in David’s controversial adoption and produced two glowing reports certifying Madonna and ex-husband Guy Ritchie as a “suitable family for David,” said although the courts are in possession of the two positive documents, new reports still have to be filed.

“We take each adoption separately,” he told Us. “We still have to have to have new reports.”

Madonna and twelve year old daughter Lourdes visited Chinkhota Village on Sunday to oversee the construction of a girl’s school Madonna hopes to open soon. When asked by a villager if she came to the country to adopt again, Madonna replied, “I don’t know.”

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