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Star Magazine, always good for a lulz, claimed Lindsay Lohan’s sleazy-looking boyfriend, Riley Giles, proposed to the recently rehabbed singer after her period was a few days “late.” Oh, and also, she got fat, which is another sure sign of pregnancy.

“Lindsay was terrified,” the source tells Star. “She’s also gained weight, and she started worrying that it was from being pregnant.”

And while having a child with someone she loves is something that Lindsay has always dreamed about, it’s not the right time, says the source. “She just figured out how to get sober, she’s certainly not ready to be responsible for a child now!”

Riley responded to the news with a good amount of glee: homeboy thought he just found his gravy train!

When Lindsay, 21, broke down and told Riley she thought she might be pregnant, his reaction was not quite what she expected. “He was actually pretty excited,” says the source. “And he did was he thought was right and proposed on the spot.”

Lindsay’s response? “It literally took her breath away,” says the source. “She was touched, but she knew it was not the right thing to do and turned him down. She told him that she cares for him deeply, but they weren’t ready to get married. Riley totally understood.”

Lindsay got her period a few days later, dashing Riley’s Ferrari dreams.

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3 Responses to “This Why I Got Married Too”
  1. Ta2dMom says:

    What a couple of idiots. :::puke:::

  2. RubberSoul says:

    I think there is a difference between being pregnant and gaining weight because you’re not doing blow 24/7.

  3. rylie says:

    rich people can’t afford birth control now, too?